10 Friendship Qualities: What Makes A Good Friend? Essential Traits For A Rich, Long-Lasting Friendship
The majority of people in the world are arguably “nice”… but do they have what it takes to be a good friend?
1. Humility – Perhaps the most important thing to look for in a friend is their ability to say “I’m sorry” when they have wronged you. No friendship can survive over time without apologies when someone has been hurt. Without humility, relationships quickly turn into a pile of bitterness and competition. Along with apologies, it’s also important that your friend is willing to forgive you.
2. Generosity – Even the most humble of friends will start to annoy you if they are super stingy with their time or money, or constantly take advantage of you. Friends who always seem to “forget their wallet” or constantly fail to “get you back” for that drink last week are not friends worth having.
3. Reliability – You know you have a great friend when you can call them up *almost* any time to talk about an issue, or to crash at their place for the night, or to grab dinner, or whatever. Friends who gossip about you with others, or who seem to bail on you regularly to hang out with someone else, are not to be trusted.
4. Care/Interest – While many people might seem to “care” about you in a surface-deep way, it becomes obvious during the tough times who truly cares about you. Do they just like to hear themselves talk, or do they actually listen and want to know how you feel? Do they exercise discretion with their words and actions regarding sensitive issues? Do they show you appreciation on special days like your birthday?
5. Sense of Humor – Contrary to popular belief, this doesn’t mean that your friend is full of hilarious jokes (there aren’t many people out there like that). It doesn’t mean that they are always laughing, or always optimistic either. Rather, it might mean that they can take a joke, or that they are not regularly offended by what you do or say, or that they can see the lighter side of certain situations.
6. Similar Morals – It’s almost impossible to find two people with the same exact moral beliefs, and if such a situation did exist, it would probably be a somewhat boring friendship! In any case, it’s best to make sure that your closest friends have similar moral beliefs as you when it comes to things that count (i.e. cheating on your partner, drug use, etc).
7. Similar/Complimentary Interests – You might not be marrying your friends, but it tends to work out better when you have interests that compliment each other. If friend #A follows baseball, and friend #B loves football, at least they can both “talk sports” sometimes. It’s not that interests must align, and it’s true that opposites attract (even among friends), but some common interests are still usually a helpful cornerstone.
8. Flexibility – An open mind, though over-praised at times, is always valuable. It’s nice to have friends with strong opinions who hold their ground on certain issues (like when your stupidity needs to be reckoned with, or when you are trying to decide where to eat!), but it’s also quite mandatory that your friends are willing and able to be reasonable when you disagree. Not only does this allow for much more interesting conversation, but it allows your friendship to grow.
9. Respect – There is a certain aspect of someone’s character that can only be described as “respectful.” It’s the part of a friend that cares about your reputation, even when you don’t. It’s the part of a friend that doesn’t let you give up on yourself, or feel down on yourself. It’s the part of a friend that encourages you, and doesn’t try to make themselves seem better than you, even when they might be. And it’s the part of a friend that doesn’t “judge” you, even when they judge you.
10. Fun – What good is a friend if you don’t enjoy being with each other!? They might have many of the qualities listed above, but you just don’t ever have fun together. While they may be a fantastic person, they might not be the best match for you as a good friend. Having fun together is what builds lasting memories.
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Discovering values of one another helping in strengthening friendship. Kind words are soothing. Not to be manipulators, true friends are sensitive.
Mentioning of friendship, I think it is well stated on the important points one to ten. In Amharic (Ethiopian language) there is a saying: “A close neighbor is better than living in a distance relative.” That indicts neighbor means as one of good friends. There is also common saying: “A friend of a need is a friend indeed.” Honest and sincere friends are very important regardless the status, religion, race or color.
This might fall along the lines of #9 Respect, but I think that a good friend should respect your religious beliefs and differences. I have a friend who I have know since grade school; since she invited me to her church, and I joined, our friendship diminished. Since I started going to church with her, she put me on the back burner. I do not go to church with her anymore. A true friend should have a sense of humor with you, but it should not be bashing in any way. I have heard the saying many times that we should not take life seriously, but there are times when you need to be taken seriously. If people don’t take you seriously, then you don’t have their respect, humility or evern similar morals.
BFFs are to tell everything and love like a family member
i have been separated from mines :'(
A best friend should be someone you dont ever get into fights with my bff and i have been friends 7 years now and she is the only friend i have never gotten to a fight wih
A good friend should also be thankful and unconditional
great!though this is more for kids..d world’s really expanded than this.
These qualities are great but i have heard that a true friend tells u in ur face what they dont like about u and be hind ur backs defends u. And a jerk talks about u without you knowing and is defending u in ur face. :D
thanks really want a good friend hope this will heip keep your fingers crossed!
lame
Really good tips this tips make strong relationship.
TRUE-A friend should not be stingy,user or have out ragious morals.They will lead YOU into disaster.I had friends that had no quams about sleeping with prostitutes I wound up doing the same.
I must say I find it very hard to find friends, girl friends with similar interests not totally but generally – any suggestions.Amy is a nut case how is this crap?
crap and a load of ****
-I think that the most important thing in a friendship is truth. I like to hear the truth about what goes on and what they might be hiding from me. I also like to have the same things in common with a friend. It makes it easier to do things together. Frienship is important.-(: