Psychology of Attraction
We categorize things into what we know. It helps making thinking easier – it’s simply human nature, we categorize so that we think more quickly and to process more information. We group known characteristics together into groups, and for those who may have taken social psychology, you know it be called “social schema.” More or less little groups of certain characteristics. I work well with examples so here we go! An example of this would be like that of a “typical gangster” – what would this gangster wear? Baggy jeans, baggy shirt, maybe a bandana, and perhaps he uses an uneducated way of speaking. If we meet some random person like this off the street, we’d probably automatically think “oh shit, he’s a gangster!” In reality, he MAY be a gangster, or he simply may dress and speak that way as a way to fit in with a social group at his school or area, or he just likes that type of clothing and he actually goes to church every Sunday.
Let’s take this a bit further and apply this to what we think is attractive, what we like. I was discussing this topic with my homie awhile back; we were talking about white girls. We talk about how they were in bed, about talking to them, about everything. He didn’t really enjoy white girls, he’s Asian as well by the way, and he says that it’d be very different in bed. As we know, the typical white girl is bigger than the typical Asian girl. He then applied it to the types of girls he likes, and he does prefer the thinner girls. Since I’ve had a white girlfriend, I have a different outlook on white girls. They’re cool! I like how they’re a bit bigger. I actually dated a girl who was really skinny, didn’t have too much meat, so every time I hugged her (I give big bear hugs) I felt like I was going to crush her. I remember this one time she cracked. So I’m always a bit wary of really skinny girls.
Maybe as a kid I had a crush on a Korean girl, Japanese girl, and a Hapa girl. That may explain why I’m hella attracted to girls of that ethnic background. It would also explain why I have an attraction to girls taller than me. Maybe one day I’ll blog about this one girl who simply amazed me.
We also discussed about how previous attractions also affected what we liked now. For instance I had this mad crush on this Chinese girl that was about my height earlier in my college career. She had a full figure and wore shirts bigger than that of normal Asian girls. You know what I mean. I was flabbergasted! Asian girls like that exist? So now every time I see an Asian chick, or any girl for that matter, who has a fuller figure I’m a bit more attracted to that.
On the flip side, we then thought about girls who may have had crushes on us. And maybe they were attracted to guys that looked like us. I’m going to laugh one day when I see a girl I know that is now going out with a Chinese/Vietnamese guy who’s bigger and has tattoos. And wears glasses that look exactly like mine.